Q & A with Dr. B.

Dr. Larry Berkelhammer

The purpose of this website, my book, and the Community Education course I teach at the College of Marin, is to teach people how to live a vibrant, meaningful life through the cultivation of self-empowerment and self-efficacy. In this weekly Q&A column, I post questions from students and from people who attend my presentations along with my answers.

Here is this week’s question:

QUESTION: How do you manage to always stay cool under pressure?

ANSWER: I am not able to always stay cool under pressure. For example, sometimes I’m tired or sick and get cranky. When that happens, I am now able to recognize it and immediately soften, but not always. Previously, I lacked the ability to even be able to recognize and objectively observe my behavior, which makes it difficult to actually change it. Most of the time, as soon as I realize that I am behaving in a way that is not in harmony with my values, I remind myself that perfection is not an option, that staying on the path of practice is all that matters and all that is even possible. This results in realignment with my valued behaviors and by reminding myself that my goal is not perfection, but rather practice, I experience self-acceptance and self-compassion.

 This website is offered as a free public service, supplying information that has been found helpful to certain people living with chronic health challenges or issues related to wellbeing. No treatment is offered on this website. The advice is general, and may or may not apply to your individual situation, and is not a substitute for psychotherapy or medical treatment.

If you would like to ask me something, you can type your question in the comment box below. An answer to your specific question may not necessarily appear in this column. The reason for that is I wait until I get a certain number of related questions, then I pick one that covers them all and I answer that one.